A book for developers who know SELECT * but break into a cold sweat when someone mentions window functions.
I've had these conversations with clients at least once a month for 20 years.
"We need to migrate to MongoDB."
Translation: Your queries are doing full table scans. You don't need a new database; you need to understand EXPLAIN.
"We should add a caching layer."
Translation: You're calculating aggregations on every request. You don't need Redis; you need materialized views.
"The ORM handles all of that."
Translation: The ORM generated 47 LEFT JOINs to fetch a user profile. It's Tuesday. Your DBA is crying.
My name is Scott, and I write love poems about SQL. Yes, really.
After two decades of queries that have saved companies millions (and cost them... well, let's not talk about that one DELETE without a WHERE clause), I've learned something important:
SQL isn't just a query language. It's a superpower hiding in plain sight.
Rewire your brain. Think in sets, not loops. Describe what you want, not how to get it.
Turn spaghetti queries into readable, maintainable code. Named steps. Clear flow. Debugging made possible.
Window functions, ROLLUP, CUBE, GROUPING SETS. The features that make queries powerful.
X-ray vision into query execution. See what the database is actually doing and fix the slow parts.
Constraints, triggers, functions. Make invalid states impossible. The database as fortress.
Find the middle ground. ORM where it helps, raw SQL where it's needed. No holy wars.
Ship "good enough" instead of chasing perfect. Focus on impact, not cleverness.
Appreciate the elegant design. 50 years and still going strong. Find the beauty in the syntax.
No spam. Just one email when the book is ready. I'll even throw in a chapter preview.
-- 1 row inserted. No spam. Ever.